When MBA admissions officers read your application, they want feel inspired by your personal statement; they want to feel that you have a strong sense of purpose and that you will aggressively work toward your goals. So, you need to ensure that you are not presenting generic or shallow goals. While this problem is not industry specific, it occurs most often with candidates who propose careers in investment banking or consulting but do not have a true understanding of what these positions entail.
For example, it is not enough for a candidate to merely state,
“In the short term, when I graduate from Wharton, I want to become an Investment Banking Associate. After three years, I will climb to VP, and then in the long term, I will become a Managing Director.”
This hypothetical candidate does not express any passion for his proposed course, does not show any understanding of the demands of the position and does not explain the value that he can bring to the firm. We suggest that to avoid these kinds of shortcomings, you conduct a simple test when writing your personal statement: if you can substitute another job title into your career goals (“In the short term, when I graduate from Wharton, I want to become a Consultant. After three years, I will climb to VP and then in the long term, I will become a Managing Director.”), you know you have a serious problem on your hands.
To effectively convey your goals, you need to own your goals, and this means personalizing them and finding your own angle into why you might be a success in the proposed position and why an opportunity exists there for you to contribute. For example, a former Forestry Engineer could make a strong argument for joining an environmental impact consulting firm (Note: He will still need to explain why he wants to join one); a Financial Analyst in the Corporate Finance Department at Yahoo! could connect his/her goals to Tech Investment Banking. While the connection need not be so direct (especially for those seeking to change careers), relating your past experiences and/or skills to your future path is still extremely important. This approach will add depth to your essay and ensure that you are taken seriously.
Read the full article: Monday Morning Essay Tip: Depth of Goals