Corporette is running a thread on the topic of what a married or divorced women is to do for a last name. As a single woman, I wouldn’t have thought the issue was so complicated . . . or contentious. Should a newly married woman take her husband’s family name? Should a divorced woman revert to her own family name? To each her own, I say.
When I was in my early twenties, i.e., when I still thought I would walk down the aisle in a white gown to marry my high school sweetheart, I simply knew that I would take my husband-to-be’s family name. It was simple, romantic, and what my own mother had done.
Just a few years later, I was less certain. I was dating a divorced man whose first wife had taken his family name, but ditched it after their divorce. Doesn’t sound very romantic, does it? It wasn’t practical either. She was a junior associate attorney at the time of the divorce and the name change caused confusion. But the hassle was short-lived and worthwhile. Without children in the picture, it’s hard to imagine wanting to carry an ex-husband’s family name for the rest of one’s life.
Now, if I were to get married, I wouldn’t change my name. I’m 30 and have established my own identity. I cannot see why I should abandon my family name any more than any future husband of mine should abandon his. Not to mention that changing my name doesn’t seem romantic in the least–but what about marriage strikes me as romantic these days? Precious little.
There isn’t a universal convention. Your name is an expression of identity. So if you want to signify your union by taking your partner’s family name, do it. If you want to maintain a distinct identity and retain your family name, do it. If you want to ditch your ex’s family name because it’s an unpleasant reminder of the past, by all means, do it and don’t apologize.
Read the full article: Last Names